Chik-Fil-A, Gorbachev, and Diapers. Oh my.

Hello Readers -

Before you all break into "It's Been a While" in the style of Staind, let me explain my absence.  I had decided that no one was reading, therefore I decided to quit, right in the middle of a blog I was writing about my pet peeves.  Then a little birdie (named Lisa) told me I was being a moron, and to finish, so here I am.

Of course, my pet peeve blog is still being written, so in the meantime, I will write about a couple of interesting/funny things that have been happening around here.

First, I will tell you about a recent family venture to Chik-Fil-A.  Now, I enjoy their kids meals because they come with fruit and my kids would eat fruit 24/7 if I let them.  One reason why I DON'T let them is the amount of dirty diapers they create…but I digress.  We were enjoying our meal, when Chris grabbed his milk bottle and pointed to a toe-headed little boy on the side and said, "Koffer!" ("Christopher")  Meaning, he thought the little boy on the side was HIM.  Now, it DID bore a resemblance to him, quite a big one, in fact, and I thought it was cute that he thought he was on his own milk jug.

The funnier part of this was Courtney.  She, upon hearing that Chris was featured on HIS milk bottle, immediately picked up hers, studied it for a second, and then pointed to the little girl on hers and identified her as "Courtney."  

Here's what her milk jug looked like:

Don't you wish the whole world was as color blind as little kids?

Something else hilariously stupid happened a few days later.  This time, it was my stupidity that made this incident funny.  

So, Connor has one birth/beauty mark/freckle - it is on the bottom of his right foot, by his pinky toe.  I know this.  I have seen that boy stark naked a million times.  But alas, one morning last week, I was playing with Connor on the floor, and, upon attempting to eat his toes, which I do daily, I noticed a large, redish-pink blotch on the bottom of Connor's left foot.  This blotch was not unlike the one on Gorbachev's head.

So I immediately begin to study said blotch.  Is it warm?  No.  Does it appear to bother him when I poke it?  No.  I look at the other foot.  I see a mosquito bite on the opposing ankle - could this be some sort of bite?  No, I see no originating bite.  Could it be some sort of allergic reaction? Possibly.  I feel for a fever - none.  My mind splits into 3409657458964 directions - might I have to take him to the pediatrician?  Maybe.  So my mind does this:

"Okay, so, if I call, what do I say?  It's not really an emergency.  It doesn't appear to be bothering him.  It's not warm, or swollen - is it?  I can't tell.  I've never noticed this before - is it a birthmark?  No.  No way, I would have seen it…"

Round and round my brain swirls.  Then, while changing his diaper, searching the rest of his body for signs of infection/reaction/disease, I get this odd instinct to try something.  I reach over and grab a baby wipe, and run it over the blotch.  

Wouldn't you know, it came right off.

The blasted thing came off.

It wasn't ANY of the 2904583954867459876 horrifying things I thought it could be.  It was removable.  

Now, I still have no idea what it was - my best guess is that the tyke spit up on something that bled, and then stepped in it, but the bottom line is, IT CAME OFF.

*shaking my head*

When I relayed this story to Lisa, her response was, "Oh yeah, I saw that yesterday.  I didn't know what it was."  WHAT?!  It was there for quite some time before i noticed it?  What if it HAD been serious?  Great mothering, Jan.

*shakes head again*

Finally, I will engage you with the kinds of thoughts and decisions I am faced with daily.  Today's decision: to move Connor to #4 diapers or not to.  

So, Connor and Courtney both wear #3's.  Chris is in 5's.  Courtney is so tiny around the thighs and waist (I know, I already hate her…) that #3's work great for her.  Connor, on the other hand, inherited my meatiness on the thigh area and #3's were beginning to make his mid-section look like we all do on Thanksgiving when we realize we should have worn pants with more give.  

So the upside to moving him to 4's is that he's got more room, and the dipes aren't digging into his tender flesh.  I figured this was all good!  What could possibly be the downside to giving him more room and comfort?  I discovered the downside this morning.  What is it, you're asking?

More room for poop.

*shudder*

Oh well.  I suppose in the long run, he should be comfortable.  I just will never understand how so much can come out of someone who's so small...

Such is life.